A simple message

I have often used this blog as a sort of journal. Sometimes I write things very personal that I struggle with and sometimes, Its just little insights I have had in my journey. I have been able to express myself in an accurate manner and tried not to be to over powering or leave my readers feeling intrusive. I enjoy the stories and pictures of my friends blogs and I have been able to talk to friends I have not seen in a while or those long distance.

So the point to all this is that I have some things to say that have become very important and personal. This year, I was a new mommy on Mother's Day. At that point Marcus was about 2 weeks old and I was struggling with breast feeding and feeling a little discouraged. A week later I got mastitas and felt a little bit more discouraged but I was told to feed through it. So I did. Now things are much better and breast feeding is easier. I was a little sad because I felt all the stress was taking away from my new mom experience. But on Mother's Day - same day that Mark graduated from the University of Toledo we went out to dinner after the ceremony. I walked out to the car to feed Marcus and was walking back in and a woman and her husband walking out made a comment. I was holding Marcus close to my chest covered from the little droplets of rain and she said "Now that is the epitome of Mother's Day."

For some strange reason, it made me feel so proud. Such a simple message but I cannot begin to express how I feel about being a mom. I pride myself on my writing abilities. For instance, I can write a heck of a paper and can do so pretty easy. But ask my to tell you what motherhood means to me and I am at a loss. There is nothing I can say to truly express how great a gift Heavenly Father has given me. I want so much for my son. I want to give him all I have and more. Everyday I have moments where I just stare at Marcus and I cannot believe he is mine. He seems so perfect and amazing and I feel like such a gift, I do not deserve.